Author Topic: Timeline / Backstory  (Read 2796 times)

Offline Todd

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Timeline / Backstory
« on: 14:00, Monday 09 Aug, 2010. »
In 2012, a professor (or whatever he is) by the name of Achim Jung published his solution for NP Completeness.  It turns out all problems can be solved in polynomial time.  But most of them are seriously fucking huge polynomials so don't get too excited.  This mostly led to a bunch of pointless discoveries such as the optimum way to peel a banana, but there was the occasional gem.  Eventually, through some chain of discoveries that I literally cannot be bothered to describe here, the existence of parallel universes was proven.  While communication was impossible, a method was discovered to pull matter from one of these so called alterniverses.  Things seemed to be going great for a while: energy prices fell, the third world began to see big improvements, and science itself benefited as projects requiring large energy inputs could be powered through a (not very) simple alterniverse generator.  The Super Jumbo Hadron Collider was built and soon discovered the smallest and most unlikely particle to date, the illusive Piggs Flyson.

But then, as is often the way with such stories, and that is probably a good thing since otherwise this game would be pretty boring with no spaceships, things took an unexpected turn.

A group of beings from the targeted alterniverse turned up.  Calling themselves the Schrodingians, they brought an important message.  Our technology was destroying small parts of their universe, and thanks to a considerble amount of bad luck, as their leader so graciously put it, "you killed my fucking cat you stupid dickmonkeys".

Luckily, through our advanced knowledge of the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, we were able to solve this diplomatic nightmare.  We placed the cat into a box, and declared that the cat is only dead if you look in the box.  Happy with this solution, and not really being the types for a large interdimensional war, the Shrodingians left us with a warning to "never pull that shit again", and kindly point us in the direction of an empty universe that we can aim our generators at instead.  This helpfully left us in the same situation as we were before their arrival, except that someone now gets to make a lot of money going around returning all the alterniverse tech to point in a different direction.

Oh and a guy from Liverpool stole one of their spaceships when they weren't looking and after they left we all went around building giant spaceships and flew off in to space to colonise the galaxy.

And here we are, a few hundred years later.
« Last Edit: 10:23, Friday 10 Sep, 2010. by Todd »

Offline Samantha

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Re: Timeline / Backstory
« Reply #1 on: 10:35, Tuesday 10 Aug, 2010. »
Nice! :D
Almost as good as the one with the wizard.
~ Nynia ~ Maggie ~ Amara ~ Rachel ~ Mizera ~ Sarah ~ Rynne ~ Varnas ~ Blue CLO ~ Xyx ~
~ "Joe" ~ Chaplain ~ Siânna ~ Hope ~ Syuzannah ~ Nareen ~ Hilde ~ Raethwyn ~ Gavin ~
~ Lahni ~ Grayson ~ Bites-The-Breeze ~ Taylor ~ Anastasia ~ Jakari ~ Lu'riel ~ Akhet ~ Richie ~

Offline Todd

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Re: Timeline / Backstory
« Reply #2 on: 10:22, Friday 10 Sep, 2010. »
I have no idea what I was on when I wrote this, worst mix of past/present tense in history, I fixed it up now.
« Last Edit: 21:13, Thursday 03 Oct, 2013. by Todd »